The Motherhood Slump

I am coming out of a motherhood slump. The past few weeks of mothering have been particularly difficult. There isn't really any real reason that I can clearly state for this. Only that the tears, the frustrations, and the heartache of it all have felt more burdensome than I have ever felt before. I've mostly been frustrated with the fact that I have been frustrated. I know that I would never want to be in any other place than where I am now. Being a wife and mother are the most treasured thing that I will ever be - so to be frustrated with the daily challenges of mothering is just downright frustrating. (I know I should go consult a thesaurus or something in order to avoid over-usage here, but sometimes there is just one word that describes it so perfectly . . . FRUSTRATION.)

As I have pulled out of the slump I have been reminded of a few truths that have anchored me back into place.

The first truth comes from President Thomas S. Monson.

"Occasionally discouragement may darken our pathway; frustration may be a constant companion. In our ears, we may hear . . . Satan as he whispers, 'Your efforts cannot save the world; your small efforts are meaningless." (Peace, 50)

As I read these sweet words from a prophet of God I realized just how much I have given into Satan's whispers. I often feel like I am not enough as a mother and wife. No one in this house is telling me that I am not adding up; nor is my Heavenly Father. The feelings of guilt and discouragement come from one being alone - the author of all lies.

Sister Patricia Holland said

"If I were Satan and wanted to destroy a society, I think I would stage a full-blown blitz on women. I would keep them so distraught and distracted that they would never find the calming strength and serenity for which their gender has always been known." (Earth As It Is In Heaven, 85)

Both of these quotes come from a fabulous book called "I Am a Mother" by Jane Clayson Johnson. The author helped me to remember that this calling of motherhood is absolutely divine. What I do within the walls of my home is celebrated in heaven and recognized by a loving Heavenly Father.

My final truth comes from scripture that states that we should not run faster than our feet can carry us. To me this scripture is about avoiding burning ourselves out. I've done that as a mom. I tend to feel so overwhelmed with all the responsibilities of house hold chores and raising children that I can forget to relax and do the things that I enjoy. I can't be a good mom without being me first. I can't be a good mom if it means giving up the things that I enjoy. While I must be careful not to go to the extreme of neglecting all my duties to pursue my hobbies; I must also be careful not to give up all my hobbies to fulfill my duties.

So here I am tonight doing something I love . . . writing. The kitchen is a mess from the days meals and dishes that I was not able to clean as I went through the day, the toys are not put away, the sharing time still needs to be planned, there is plenty of packing to be done, and I could bore you all night long with my "un-done list". Sometimes I need to stop and be me. If I don't let myself be me then the monster version of me can quickly take control. And no one likes the monster version of a mommy - ESPECIALLY the mommy.

Jordynisms - Proper Identification

I never realized how many silly names I have for my children. There is little lady, silly goose, funny honey, crazy kid, and others that aren't always quite as kind.

I came to this realization of abundant nicknames a few weeks back when Jordyn and I had the following conversation:

Mommy: "Come on you silly girl, let's get going."

Jordyn: "Mommy, I not a silly girl."

Mommy: "Well, then what are you then?"

Jordyn: (With a big toothy grin) "I'm Jordyn."

Now just about anytime that I call her a silly name we have this exchange.

Kenzie's Newest Conversation

• "ree-dic-lee-lus" = ridiculous (it is so funny to hear her trying to use the big words that I use in my every day language)
• "anilla" = vanilla
• A few days ago I got around to cleaning the playroom before the girls were up. When Kenzie came in she shrieked "Wow! It is clean in my whole life!"
• Kenzie has developed a fondness for Strawberry Shortcake (the cartoon character). The other night at dinner she randomely turned to me and asked "Mama, you know who makes strawberries?" I was expecting an answer like Heavenly Father, or dirt, or its a plant, but no . . . she quickly announced "Strawberry Shortcake".

Jk's Newest Phrases

A few mornings back Jordyn woke up with the hic-ups. While I was dressing her I asked her where her hic-ups came from. She looked at me like I was absolutely crazy, pointed at her mouth and said, "In my mouth mommy".

Anyone know what a "no-ga bar" is? - if it weren't for the fact that she can say bar clearly it would have taken me a LONG time to translate this one into granola bar

Jordynisms - Her Favorite Word

NOOOOOO!

Every mother of a two year-old is well acquainted with this word . . . right?

Please say yes.

Kenzisms - Manners

I don't know what it is about my children starting out a sentence with the words "I want" or "Can I" that bothers me. I truly don't even notice when another child does it, but when my own kids begin their requests with "Mom, I want . . . " or "Mom, can I . . . " I find myself wincing.

So, I often prompt my children to say "May I" before their little requests. I feel that I have to prompt them more often than not to use this small form of good manners.

Sigh.

I wish it weren't so.

I wish they just used the sweet little "May I" phrase without my help.

But practice makes perfect and we practice a lot, so I should be optimistic right?

So, here is where the Kenzism comes into play.

A typical conversation would go as follows:

Kenzie: (often with a whiny or demanding tone) Mom, can I have some milk?

Mom: (Gives Kenzie the half smile and the raised eyebrow which the children know mean they either need to say please, sorry, thank-you or may I. They are often guilty of goes through all four in a rushed fashion in hopes to hurry the process along) How do you ask nicely?

Kenzie: (With a big goofy smile and in a sing-song voice) May I can I have some milk pleeeeease?

I didn't type that incorrectly if you were having to take a second read through there. Kenzie cracks me up by saying May I and Can I all in the same sentence, and I don't know why, it just makes me giggle. Garrett and I were trying to correct her error a few weeks ago when we looked at each other and realized that we didn't WANT to change it because it can make us laugh so hard. She'll figure it out all in good time . . .

Kenzisms - A New Discovery

While eating our lunch today of chicken nuggets and french fries Kenzie took a a big bite of her chicken nugget and then looked at her nugget with great surprise. She then exclaimed:

"Hey Mom!" (with an intonation of great discovery) "There is chicken in my chicken nugget!"

Apparently up 'til now the chicken nugget has just been some mystery food that every kid in America finds satisfying . . . today it actually became a food that has chicken in it. :)