To Whom It May Concern

I need to express a few of my pet peeves to those opinionated strangers out there who feel the need to express their opinions about my kids.

First of all, I think I am competent enough to know how to dress my children. Don't come up and touch my infant's bare feet and tell me that her little feet are too cold. First off, you shouldn't go around touching other people's infants if you don't know them, it's just not right. Secondly, you are not aware of the fact that the child just had the blow out of the century and her socks were subjected to the blow out proceedings. So, I'm sorry I wasn't carrying another pair of socks that day, but something is bound to slip your mind in the scurry out the door with two children under the age of two . .

Secondly, please make an effort to notice the gender of my child. Now don't get me wrong . . . if you catch her without a bow on and dressed in neutral colors, the gender guessing game then becomes my fault; however, pink clothing and bow can only indicate one thing . . . SHE is NOT a HE!!

Finally, I am NOT a nanny to my two kids, I had my children UNDER wedlock, and NO they were NOT an accident. I would think these inquires into my personal life would at least permit being on a first name basis . . . wouldn't you think?